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2006/9/10 Still The Tears ComeSeptember 11, 2001
08:46:26 am A moment of silence please.
 Our blog friend Kelly wrote in her space about her perspective on 9/11/2001. This inspired me to relive that day and write about it. My perspective I guess.
We all remember what we were doing that terrible day and how we felt then and, for me, still. I still cry for everyone that lost their life on that dark day. I cry for all that remain to remember that dark day. And I cry the most for all the children that will never hear the voice, feel the warmth of an embrace or look into the loving eyes of a loved one that is now gone from their lives.....forever.
On that day I remember........I was driving to my first clients house for the day. I'm not really sure if I had another to go to or even if I went. I just remember that first one. I had the radio on in the truck and there was a voice talking about the plane crashing. I thought it was an advertisement for a movie or something like that. It didn't occur to me that this was real since I didn't hear it from the beginning.
As I drove I realized this was actually happening, my heart started to race and I couldn't get into that house fast enough. I turned on the TV and couldn't believe what I was seeing. It wasn't real....was it? How could this be happening? What happened? Why?
I started to work. What else should I do? This was what seemed to be a tragic accident.....then I looked back to the TV to witness the second plane crashing. It was unbelievable. I remember I felt sick and sat down. I started to shake and the tears came. What the Hell is going on? How could this be happening....here....in the United States?
Then as I watched, as did the world, I and the world became fully aware of what was happening. I thought to myself "what should I do?"....."what could I do?" Nothing, absolutely NOTHING! I could only watch as each event occurred. One tragic scene after another. We all know what we saw, as it was happening, and we will never forget.....and we never should.
I finished at that house and went home. I had to call my family. I was still in Arizona and everyone but Mom was back here in Wisconsin. I called each and everyone of my family and friends to hear their voice and to make sure they were ok, but mostly to tell them I love them because I had no idea where this was going to go. I was so scared that this was it.....life as we knew it was over. And in some ways it was and still is. No one person is as they were before this happened. How could anyone be? It was a life changing human tragedy for all the world.
I remember being glued to the TV when I could.....taping when I couldn't watch. I had to know everything that was happening and at the same time didn't want to know anything. Five years later the pain is still there.....the tears still come.....and the memories return. I feel it will always be this way. And that's okay because I never want to forget. I only hope that this great Nation of ours, our government, has learned and not forgotten how vulnerable we were, and maybe still are. It was an arrogance of our own making, in many ways.
What sticks out in my mind to this day was the eerie silence that came. When all air traffic was stopped. For days I remember never hearing or seeing a plane in the sky, except for the occasional Air Force jets. It was actually nice, but for all the wrong reasons.
My sympathies to all that lost someone on that day.........my sympathies to a Nation that lost even more on that day.
Colleen
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